A Response!

Hmm, it seems i’ve got some comments from some people. Or should I say, one person who’s posted under 3 different names. He claims that it was he that has made my page have 150 hits in one day. No. The hit counter works on whole visits. Pressing refresh 150 times will NOT add 150 to the hit counter. Neither will visiting different pages.

Apparently this was done in an attempt to ‘overload my bandwidth’. Quite how he plans to overload an unlimited bandwidth site I really don’t know. Fool.

Uh, yeah. Will post tomorrow to you real readers.

PS. all you’re doing by visiting the site on 150 seperate occasions (sadass) is pushing me up the website popularity list. Alrealdy you’ve got me from the bottom of the heap onto the noteworthy page. Your plan backfired. BADLY. Fool.

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By James Plant Posted in Uncategorized Tagged ,

The Measuring Spoon Drawer – The Grand Opening!

*Fanfare*

Hurrah! Today, I open this website to the world. My opinions may or may not be broadcast across the globe.

This site is being officially opened by a Special Guest, none other than..

..my Brother.

I’m on a budget here! 😉

He will confirm that he has declared this blog officially open tomorrow, with a comment on this very post!

So, what differences will you see?

  • A new name!
  • The introduction of pixel art doohickeys on the site
  • The complete open-ness of the site

And some other things here and there.

Now go, and read plentily!

-James

PS. Today happens to be the birthday of my all-time favourite Video Game character – Sonic the Hedgehog. I would say happy birthday, but he doesn’t really exist.

© James Plant, 2008
All Trademarks acknowledged.

All is set for the grand opening…

So, I’ve decided to open up the site to anyone who may wish to veiw it. Anyone may comment too. Why? Well, I’ve thought about the possible *snigger* ‘implications’ and thought that if all you people are going to do is post the odd comment saying ‘mole’ then that’s fine. If after 15 years you people can still only think of one ‘insult’ that I’m frankly immune to by now, then you don’t matter in my life.

Anyway, to business to the population of Earth.

This blog is all set for it’s grand opening! ‘What’s this?’ You may think. ‘This blog has been on the air for near two months now!’. Well, I’ve never got around to using the blog for what I intended it for: delivering my opinions and messages to the world. So, from Monday June 23rd, 2008, that’s exactly what I’ll do. No blocking, everyone free to comment.

Why do I choose this particular date? Well, It so happens that tomorrow is the birthday of my all time favourite video game character, Sonic the Hedgehog.

Enjoy, all 6 billion of you!

-James

This blog is written by and is copyright James Plant 2008.
All trademarks acknowledged.

Haggis etc!

Wahoo’s-a-plenty! I can go to RAF Kinloss! 😀 So, a week off school to go flying and walking and that sort of thing in the only country in the UK I haven’t visited yet. Yipee.

To business.

Mood: Dozy

Beverage: ASDA brand cream soda

Shopping is an easy thing to do. You enter the store, purchase the desired wares and then you leave the store. However, ASDA have found a way to completely screw things up. Come with me, into… THE FUTURE!!

AUTOMATED TILLS.

These are the most tedious things in the history of grocery shopping. You see, my Mother has suddenly decided she wants to be eco-friendly. That means no plastic carriers. That means filling the house with these weird raffia bags that everywhere sells you. The stupid tills don’t work with them. They don’t actually tell you this, so you’re left to wonder why on earth the machine is saying that there is an ‘unexpected item in bagging area’ and repeatedly summoning a grumpy woman from the help desk.

Once the woman has reprogrammed the machine, it decides that it works with the stupid grass bags, but then it has a tantrum if you dare to move the damn things.

I had the tenacity to (accidentally) move one of the bags when I thought we were finished. We wern’t. Sirens blared, searchlights swept around, angry dogs barked and the grumpy woman got up from behind her little desk to tell us off.

Yep, those things are stupid. USE THE STAFFED TILL.

This blog written by James Plant
All trademarks acknowledged.

Plant’s trip to Strasbourg – Part 2 – Europa-Park 2

Well, I’m going to write a bit more about Strasbourg while it is still interesting. Starting with more Europa-Park! Aren’t you happy?

I’m going to write about my favourite roller coaster there. The Euro-Mir! This is quite literally the coolest ride ever. It is themed, for some reason, around the Russian space station Mir, which was still operational at the time the ride was built. Bet they’re feeling foolish now. The theming is incredible. To start, you go through a tunnel with stars on the inside past fictional space vehicles and stuff, until you reach the spiral lift tower, which is occupied by a HUGE rocket! And all this time you are listening to the best themed music you could imagine.

Boop, da-boop-boop-boop, da boop-boop-doop, da doop-doop-boop etc.

I hear the ride is themed around re-entering the Earth’s atmosphere. Kind of apt considering what happened to the real Mir. The theming is seriously incredible. None of the other rides came close. Even the queue was close to enjoyable.

There were other good rides too. For instance, the ‘Matterhorn Blitz’ was good but had the most annoying queue in the universe. You queued through a ‘traditional style’ Swiss house with an inordinate amount of automata people doing things. A fibreglass man in a bed snored loud enough to shake your skull loose from your neck. A woman waved a peeler in the vincinity of a potato. A girl brushed a goat so much that the goat’s plastic skin had a hole in it. It was all worth it in the end, however. The Matterhorn Blitz itself is set around a sort of skiing lodge thing. Sod the Silver Star. This thing feels so fast that your liver implodes.

Now, one person on the coach after Europa-Park refused to beleive that the Silver Star only went at 80 Mph. He said that it went much faster. No it didn’t. For those who have never ridden a proper roller coaster, it’s all about perception. 70 or 80 Mph in a car may not feel that fast, but the Silver Star was like doing 80 mph on an office chair. And the Matterhorn Blitz was like doing 200. For the Cadets reading, I can only describe it as like doing your AEF 20 feet above the ground.

More still to be written.

This blog written by James Plant.
All trademarks acknowledged.
A legal footnote? So it is!

Here’s something that tastes *foul*..

Have you ever tried to take a tablet and left the thing in your mouth for too long? That’s what I mean. I experienced said worst taste in the world this morning with my hayfever tablet. You have no idea.

Another interesting combination is that which I am experiencing right now. A combination of Extra mints and Tesco own-brand ginger beer. Two things that are very nice on their own, but… don’t try them together. It’s like ketchup and bananas. They just don’t ‘work’.

To business.

Mood: Neutral.

It turns out that it is Fathers day on Sunday. So I purchased a card. Sounds simple? No. There are only two kinds of Fathers day card.

#1 – The ‘Happy Fathers’ day to my post-mid-life crisis father who dismantles MGs or plays golf’ type card

or

#2 – ‘You are a fat git’ (inside – ‘Only joking! LOL!’)

And they ALL mentioned beer to some extent.

I did find a nice Simpsons themed one, but it was A) repetitive as I think i’ve got a Simpsons card before and B) cost more than the factory that made it.

So yeah, that was in ASDA. NEVER go to the toilet in ASDA. You are guaranteed to lose the person you are with when you come out. I incidentally bumped into Mr Jones while searching for my mother.

Well, I’m out of fuel (Ginger beer). Plus I’m out of material.

Don’t do drugs!

~James

This blog written by James Plant
All trademarks acknowledged
A legal footnote? Stop reading now.

Woah. This is some good stuff!

It seems that already, this blog is becoming quite popular. 286 views since we opened about two weeks ago, not including me.

Mood: Zippy

I hear that yesterday was Lucy M’s birthday. Happy birthday to her! I also hear that yesterday was the birthday of American actor Johnny Depp. Happy birthday Mr. Depp as well.

To business! Cadets tonight was cool. Modelling was the order of the day, with my special ‘incontinence’ style of painting. Then I was told how to iron a shirt. Spiffy.

Unfortunately I won’t be down for the next two fridays. 😩

I blame society.

I’m done now. 🙂

-James

This blog written by James Plant
All trademarks acknowledged.
A legal footnote? Look closely. It's actually a lemon meruange.

You can stop reading now.

Normal service is resumed!

There is a good sign that this blog is going up in the world. For the first time, I’ve had spam! Now, this may be tedious and annoying for you people who are offered a larger appendage every time you check your email, but for me, this is a good sign! It means that I am now listed on major search engines.

Oh, and by the way, whoever thought they could try and post offensive comments, 1) All comments have to be approved by me, 2) The spam filter blocks this kind of thing and 3) I now have your email address. Owned. It doesn’t matter how many ‘blockers’ you use, I still have your IP.

Plus I can bar your computer. So, to paraphrase no-one in particular, “Get the hell off my webspace!”

I love that quote.

-James

PS. To you blatant cowards, if you have something to say, why not say it to my face? Scared or something? Yeesh.

This blog written by James Plant
All trademarks acknowledged

Night-time cheese and questionable noodles.

Mood: Relaxed

Well, I’m back from Cadets, and I was not eaten by a Bengal Tiger on the way back, you may be glad to hear!

And yes, I was slightly ill at Cadets tonight. I’m not actually sure what caused it.. although It may have been the noodles which had been in the fridge for an unknown amount of time. And I now know that I should always go in uniform. Because the alternative is too horrible.

Introducing:

The marginally-too-small overall!

Yes. Too small it was. It was virtually skin-tight.

The more eagle-eyed of you (Including any eagles reading this for that matter..) will have noticed that, yet again, I have put in the title subtle hints about night-time cheese. I am of course, talking about weird dreams. Take this one from last night:

I was actually IN the game Sonic CD! How cool is that! I remember me and some random person had won a competition (!) and we were in Collision Chaos good future! Now that is a GOOD DREAM.

For the record – Collision Chaos Present’s music is so awesome that half the time I go on that level just to hear the music. Buy Sonic Gems Collection and listen away!

Ok I’m done. It’s also getting late now, so I gotta put the computer off and go to sleep. Au Revoir!

~James

This blog was written by James Plant.
All trademarks acknowledged.
A legal footnote? OR IS IT?